get a grip

Not feeling the best in the past two weeks, been procrastinating in not applying for my PR when I should have. Stupid thoughts and lies just keep going through my head on what is to come. Little things that shouldn't really matter brought me down. Its one thing to be dreaming for something ,wanting to see it happen and another to get your hands dirty and start doing it. There's no one to be blamed but me. For not taking any responsiblity well, for not stepping up when I should have, for not having the right attitude and character. Seriously I'm so good in complaning that I don't do anything about it.

Jesus, I want to fall in love with you again, you are my breathe, my love my life. Forgive me for the times where I've ran around aimlessly doing my own things which doesn't even benefit and help. I need your strength, I need to rest in the shadow of your wings. Just need one touch from You, daddy. I want to be in that place of surrender again where I give you all my dream, every part of me.

I need a new set of 'tires' because mine is almost worn out :(

Hayden Panettiere- My hero Is You

Found a song by accident, and the lyrics for this song reminds me so much of Jesus. I don't think Hayden is a christian, she's the awesome Claire that can't die in Heroes. Maybe the person who wrote the song was but nevertheless this song is what I was feeling a few days ago. Many doubts just started hitting me but it's so good to make the decision to just get in your bedroom and cry out and seek Him where I can find Him :)

You know I try to be
All that I can
But there's a part of me
I still don't understand

Why do I only see
What I don't have
When my reality
Its things are not that bad

Your faith has shown me that

When my world goes crazy
You won't let go
When the ground gets shaky
You give me hope
When I try to push you away
You never move, yeah

Now when I start doubting and
You help me see
There's a strength, and a mind, and a power in me
Oh believe me thereain't nothing I can't do
My hero is you, yeah
My hero is you

I never saw the way
You sacrificed
Who knew the price you paid
How can I make it right
I know I've gotta try

When my world goes crazy
You won't let go
When the ground gets shaky
You give me hope
When I try to push you away
You never move, yeah

Now when I start doubting and
You help me see
There's a strength, and a mind, and a power in me
You believe there ain't nothing I can't do
My hero is you, yeah
My hero is you

I am a child of God

So far....

Been reflecting on what God has done in my life for the past few weeks (and months) and realised that I'm still a work at progress but have been grown from strength to strength and glory to glory. One prayer that I've been praying during the start of the year was to not just catch the revelation from heaven but to experience it. I don't want to just know it but able to live it and experience it out and Praise God, I've been experiencing the goodness and power of God!

This year has been a lot of challenges and ooo how prophecy can really mess your life up! (in a good way) John Jacks prophecied that God will bring challenges to me and to take that opportunity and respond to it. The challenges has come in all areas, at work, in my personal life and in ministry. Been focusing on my new life group Gen418a to focus on how to build it and make it healthy and grow, its mind blowing because I'm still inexperienced and sometimes think I'm incapable, but I want to trust God to use me and cause Gen418 to be one that can bring, faith, hope, love and a renewed passion and vision as people come in, they will experience the tangible love of God and get to know their destiny.

On a side note I want to say that I'm an ordinary man blessed by a extraordinary God. I thought I would have to wait for another 2 years but finally somehow my timing and God's timing is different and He has blessed me with a wonderful mate yay!!! :) I want to continue to grow in this new journey to serve, honor and protect....... ok wait.. stop that sounds like a slogan for the Policeman! urgh. How about being a man that she can trust that I'll always be God fearing, will always be faithful and make her feel that shes the most blessed person in the world ;)

People have asked what are my feelings? The first few times I didn't know how to answer them and gave an answer... I don't know cos I'm shy with my feelings hahaha but now I do after giving it some thought.

• I'm nervous yet excited
• I'm happy to get the approval and blessings from the leaders and knowing that we're not in this journey alone but there will be others joining the journey with us
• It's weird how many people have seen this coming way last year even before I had any thoughts or feelings.
• and lastly.... God is good :)

Passion for your name

Facing your mountains

All of us has will eventually face a mountain or 'Goliath' in our lives.
And truthfully... the response when God reaveals what He wants to do in my life goes from 'yeah! Bring it On' to 'Oh cripes, what have I gotten myself into' when we really get our hands dirty into it.

We face fears.
David had to face Goliath
Moses had the fear of public speaking
Noah was asked to built an ark and he probably had no idea what it is.
The ten spies had fear when they saw giants in the land.

Bottom line is that God has never asked us to do anything that was easy, if it was then we wouldn't need Him and we must fight through Fear :) Perfect love drives out fear, I believe David had a love and passion for God and his people that he didn't had the fear to face Goliath.

If God has called you, He will equipped, sustain and empower you. Of course it might seem impossible but what is impossible with man is possible with God, that's why in Zech 4:6 it says its by God's spirit, not by our might or power. You may think you are a nobody, or an ordinary person who God wouldn't use. Think again~! God is in the business of using ordinary people to do extraordinary things!!

Acts 4:13

The members of the council were amazed when they saw the boldness of Peter and John, for they coyld see that they were ordinary men with no special training in the Scriptures. They also recognized them as men who had been with Jesus.

Be blessed =)

5 reasons why people quit ministry...

Read it, love it and got to repost it
Five Reasons Why People Quit The Ministry by Perry Noble

#1 – Burnout
I once heard someone say, “I would rather burn out than rust out.” Uh…BOTH are bad because NEITHER of them finish well. Too many people in the ministry work themselves into a frenzy, never take time to disconnect and refresh and do absolutely nothing for fun…this always goes bad!

When it comes to leadership circles in America we’ve equated being busy with being godly; however, the haunting reality that confronts that idea is what God Himself said in Psalm 46:10, “BE STILL and know that I am God”…not “be busy!”
If we are not taking regular breaks, doing things “just for fun” and disconnecting then burnout isn’t a matter of “if,” but “when!”

#2 – Unrealistic Expectations
Too many people believe that ministry = easy…despite the fact that it seemed to go really bad for everyone in the Scriptures that sold their life out to Him! Jesus went to the “place of the skull” to be crucified…why would we ever believe He would lead us to “the place of the mattress?”

When we impose our plans and ideas on God and refuse to surrender to His…and then things don’t go as planned…it usually leads to people “giving up” because “God just didn’t come through.”

#3 – Criticism
Criticism hurts…it always will…and if it ever doesn’t then, according to my counselor, something is dead inside of you. AND…it is always personal (especially when someone begins with, “don’t take this personally…but…).

You can’t let the critics dicate what you think/feel! If you have a ministry that constantly responds to critics then you will not have one that responds to Jesus. You MUST respond to the people who God has placed in your life to surround you and protect you–that’s not criticism but rather correction. However, you cannot allow those who know you the least to control you the most–period!

#4 – Discouragement
Every church leader I’ve ever chatted with has done some serious battles with discouragement. After your message on Sunday the enemy comes in and begins to accuse you, telling you that you did a pathetic job and that no one is going to come back next week. Heck, I’ve had to battle discouragement during the message before, hearing voices inside of my head saying things like, “you suck, these people hate you…you need to quite the ministry…” and so on.

This is why it is essential for leaders to get in a place like David did in I Samuel 30:1-6…he faced an incredibly discouraging situation and yet someone managed to find His strength in the Lord.
I do this through reading through encouraging letters and emails that I’ve received in the past, placing myself in encouraging environments and focusing on what God’s Word says about me.

#5 – Losing Focus On God’s Power
When we actually believe it is up to us to make people come back to church every week rather than believing we are conduits that God wants to work through to do that very thing…it’s over! Because…we fall into the trap of trying to outdo ourselves every week, every series and every year…and prayer/seeking the Lord becomes something we love to talk about but fail to do. He saves…He draws people…and He uses us to do it. It’s not up to us…but rather allowing Him to work through us to accomplish all that He wants to do!

Face it…on our own we don’t have enough power to blow our nose! We NEED Him…HE is the game changer!!!

THAT question

Pillar of Support

Received a text from a good friend of mine to pray for her for some stress and 'crap' she's feeling. Although we haven't contacted each other for months yet there's still this connection that we are family and we're out there to watch each others backs :)

Received an encouraging reply after prayer for her saying 'Thx Jay, you've never failed to be my pillar of support"

It was encouraging to me because for the past few days I've felt crap that I haven't been a good friend to others , haven't been a good brother, haven't been taking responsibility well and well that text just puts a smile on my face and telling me to keep going and not give up. I want to be a pillar of support to My Church and to My friends and family. Let's be a pillar of support to one another's lives through the good times and bad times =)

Reasons great things God is going to do in the Church by Perry Noble

Got this from Perry Noble's site and after reading it, it has really encouraged and reminded me what God is going to do for and through Hope Gold Coast. I thought 'man I people need to read this!'
Be Blessed!! =)

#1 – Jesus said that HE would build His church…that is a promise and it is true of YOUR CHURCH! (Matthew 16:18)

#2 – Jesus said that HIS Word would not fail to produce a harvest…so if you are faithful in declaring HIS Word then something GREAT is taking place, even if you can’t see it yet! (See Isaiah 55:8-13)

#3 – You are meeting resistance…which means the enemy is pissed! Stay focused on Christ…you KNEW this would happen (Ephesians 6:12, I Peter 5:8)…entrust yourself to Jesus (I Peter 2:21-25) and believe that Isaiah 54:17 is true!

#4 – God is raising up leaders around you, ones that comprehend the meaning of Ephesians 4:11-16, who want to OWN the ministry and be participators rather than spectators.

#5 – God started your church…and He will bring it to completion…HE’S NOT FINISHED WITH YOU YET! (Philippians 1:6)
#6 – The church is STILL His plan, He has NOT changed His mind…and He loves your church just as much as He loves any church!

#7 – He is leading you towards greater steps of faith…which means you are becoming more desperate for Him…and when THIS happens He shows up in amazing ways and does the unexplainable and the undeniable! (Hebrews 11:6)

#8 – Though you may feel discouraged and disheartened…you STILL believe in WHO HE IS and WHAT HE HAS CALLED YOU TO DO! You may have suffered some setbacks lately…but there is something inside of you telling you to not give up on the God who has never given up on you! You’ve STILL got a fire (Jeremiah 20:9) and a hope!

#9 – God has given you a vision…one that is HUGE…one that keeps you up at night. And the fear of NOT doing what HE has told you to do is beginning to trump the fear of man!

#10 – His church is coming together like never before to begin completing each other instead of competing against each other!!! When we all cheer each other on and work together…it speaks VOLUMES to a world that is desperate for Jesus!

'Holiday'

hoboy, its July and we're more than halfway through 2010! Been reflecting on what has happened this year and can't help but smile at how Good God has been this year (His always good) and how much I've been blessed by seeing breakthroughs for not only myself but for my brothers and sisters. Sure there were times of discouragement and even disappointments but I've learnt to not dwell on it too much but learn to put my faith on what is unseen.

I have been to so many 'holidays' this year that it has really brought me to a whole' notha level and I'm excited! When I said 'holidays' I meant Conference's that I've attended.

1. Jesus Culture conference in January!! There's no better way than to start a Conference in the first month of 2010!!!
2. Annual Oceania Convention In April..... Its enouraging to see what God is doing in our movement and the changes we're having
3. Danny Silk conference- Didn't felt like going for this one because of an issue I had to deal with, but like any other people who 'didn't feel' like going but went anyway, God turned up and messed me up =) This was the first time ever that I went through a fire tunnel and the moment I went in, I felt God put a stamped on my heart and I had that assurance that I'm marked by heaven wow!!
4. Upcoming Bill Johnson Kingdom Culture Conference!! BRING IT ON!!!

Just an encouragement that I would love to share with you... ]

We can go for conference, get charged up, pumped, refreshed and come back going "we're going to go and do this and that, vision renewed" but later in the week, discouragement sets in, or u didnt get a great encounter or you get bored and we get disconnected and waiting for the next Church service or conference. Why? Because our connection with God got lost in the middle of the week or during the day. My heart longs to see worshippers that will come to Church and Life group all already connected and ready to soak in the Presence, no longer having to 'strive' in worship like Belle would say 'having Spiritual Constipation errrkkk' ><"" but will be able to press in easily. So keep pressing on and don't lose that connection, learn to even worship and be in His presence at work or class, its possible :)

the aftermath

Soooo Melbourne was heaps of fun except for the 2nd day when my friend started to smoke and for some wierd reason whenever I just breathe in a bit of the smoke from him, my nose would start to itch and I would sneeze like a machine gun in a minute. no kidding. this is the second time its happened and I don't think its a coincidence. and from the flu comes the fever, the rain in Melbourne didn't make it any better either. Worse... i slept at 5am that night, having flu and fever.

On top of that I went camping outdoors during winter... woohoo!! It was actually heaps of fun, making tents, talking and chillin' at the bonfire, cooking and sleeping. Of course my fever didn't get any better but who cares, I had fun XD

However!! I did learnt a big lesson, and it has opened my eyes to see how I wasn't taking care of my body properly lacking in proper vitamins. Sure I drink Vitamin Water now and then but I don't think its as effective as the proper capsule ones. Made me realize the importance of vitamins and figures why I never got sick in high school because mum always gave me vitamins for breakfast :) and I know some will leave a comment on 'what about vegetables?' People are just assuming I DON'T eat them, I DO eat them but i PREFER not to. so start eating! Good news is that I have and I have people around me to testify that for me XD

Other than that a friend sent me a message saying how my blog writing has inspired her to start writing a blog as well and I'm like 'wow! That's pretty cool because I know I'm not a good writer but hey! If whatever things I wrote inspired you then go for it :) "

till then.. I found a cure for my fever... .........Playing my PS3 =P

Off to Melbourne

somehow facebook is acting up again and all the post I updated here (in blogspot) gets updated in FB a week later. so if you're reading this from FB I'm probably back from Melbourne already

Message from the future: "I'm back from Melbourne and I Love it there!! However there is a danger, Jason is back and the awesomeness of Jason is to great that Gold Coast can't handle the heat!" .....whatever

I'm finally taking a much needed break from work. All the annual leave i've taken was to go to conferences and church related stuffs but this will be a proper break, I'm just gonna go to Melbourne and shop shop, eat eat and sleep sleep. Stoked to meet up with my old mates from high school and see how they're doing, pray for me that I will even have the opportunity to speak into their life or even minister to them.

I sure hope I can enjoy Melbourne!! People are coming to QLD to escape the cold and get the sun, I on the other hand is escaping from the sun and wanting the cold =)


here's something I got from Phil Pringle

"For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline" 2 Tim 1:7

God's spirit gives us power, love and soundness of mind. Fear robs us of these. Faith in God crushes hatred and realeases love. Fear confuses our mind. Faith brings peace and calm to our troubled heads. So stay in Faith and stay out of Fear!!

See you in Church!

O Praise Him

I hope facebook doesn't cut out the video I put in my blog, if a video is not showing as usual go to jasonkid87.blogspot.com to watch it.

Wow! This week has been fairly tough for me actually, been a bit dry, started being lazy and all that jazz. But throughout all the tough times, there's only one thing that matters... your connection with God. It was so hard for me to press in. I didn't 'feel' like lifting my hands, I didn't 'feel' to open my mouth or to even open my bible. oh boy, was I wrong, like Jonah I was trying to run away, somehow someway God just brought me into this verse

Psalm 146:1-2 "Praise the Lord, O my soul! While I live I will praise the Lord, I will sing praises to my God while I have my being!"

I love how David says 'WHILE I LIVE' I will praise the Lord.. Wow! its a lifestyle, its your everything, as long as we live, we are commited to Praise His name! To be honest, one flaw I have is that during my own devotional time I would tend to skip 'Praise' and go straight to 'worship' .I'm like yeaaa come on straight into the holy of holies! Boy was I wrong... I have underestimated the power of Praise, Phil Pringle said "Praise opens gates into the presence of God' When you choose to Praise God you're singing on how good God is, what He has done and just that choice of choosing to praise God with your soul when you dont feel like it will bring about freedom, and encourages your spirit to rise up!

The last thing you want is letting the devil silence your mouth and keep you from singing. Don't ever let the devil steal your song, its your key to victory! Whatever is causing you to hang your head down in defeat has been overcomed by the Presence of God in you! so let's start Praising Him! =)

David Crowder Band- O Praise Him

Sunday Reflections (last week and two weeks ago)

So I failed to update my blog on time and I have 30 min to spare before I leave to work so I thought hey might as well update it

Do you remember the post from 2 weeks ago on Sunday night reflections about Ps Lai Ling giving a word about me playing the guitar with anointing? well on that same week with that reflections, little did I know Ps Lai Ling came and preached at our church again and again because she moved in the prophetic she was prophesying into different ones and funny enough I got a word from her again and it was about my worship, and how the Presence of God in me is going to flow out to other people and so on. I can't remember the whole thing, (anyone has the recording or took notes?) but I was really touched on how God will be using me and confirming what he spoke to me ages ago and reinforcing the promises he Has for me. God is so so good.

On another note GSL (generation salt and light) started last week and praise God it has been going well. I'm very encouraged for the different ones who came despite their fear, exams and lack of ability but believing that what they've sowed in, they will definately reap in the near future. I want to believe for miracles, people being set free and souls saved during our time in GSL

Some thoughts from 31st and 6th Sunday

• Be a 3D disciple- Dedication, Discipline and Dilligence (it wasn't called 3d but seems like a good title tho :P)
• Fight for what is HIS
• DO NOT DOUBT God's ability to bring forth fruits
• Remember Jesus discipled 12 disciples that discipled the world.... (you can be one that will raise the next Billy Graham)
• Im excited about the new direction we're going in with the new series on gift-based ministry, everyone is gonna be equipped!
• We've heard it many times but here goes..... WE HAVE A RISEN (NOT DEAD) Savior!!
• IF Jesus was dead we might as well eat, drink, be merry and die lol
• Remember what you do IS NOT a dead sacrifice, even though you do not see it.
• Ps Lance: 'When we lose sight of how great the gospel msg is, we will often lose motivation to live it out'

Something I learnt this week was that God's love is furious and strong. No matter how far I've backslidden or how I feel of running away from God, God keeps calling me back, reaching out to me, a father's heart longing to see His son/daughter come back. How, o how much He loves Me(and you) , it brought me back to the song by Misty Edwards where the verse goes 'You won't relent until you have it all"

I am my beloved's and his desire is toward me.-
Song of Solomon 7:10

Let all....

Sunday night reflections

Woah, I haven't done this in awhile and I was planning to do this every Sunday. So here's my ill attempt to get this going again and hopefully get the ball rollin' for me.

I remember couple of months back when Ps Lai Ling came down to GC to preach and I was on the worship team, I got so discouraged and frustrated on my own ability to play that, during worship, I actually said 'what am I doing here playing? Might as well not play at all, I sound terrible with my playing and all other nonsense thoughts of just giving up'

For those who were there remembered before the sermon started Ps Lai Ling started to prophecy into different ones. Here I am sitting down, thinking of giving up playing when Ps Lai Ling pointed to me and told me that God is going to anoint me in my playing where a New Sound will come out, something along those lines but all I remember was a new sound from the guitar playing.

Guess what?
After the service many people commented that they felt the worship was different, as if there was a new sound. They said the guitar sounded different and there was anointing in the voice and musical instruments. I've been using almost the same guitar effects for worship and I have never ever change the settings but people said it sounded very good, was different and some were even thinking there was a violin playing lol. As a team we knew our playing and music was dull and dry during practice but after 15min of just worshipping God, I think an angel just pop down and fine tuned the PA system and our instruments to make it sound good, Seriously! :)
Then it pop into my head yesterday on what Ps Lai Ling prophecy that there will be the anointing to play a new sound that will come out thru my guitar playing. Praise God!

I want to believe that God will use me to play notes from heaven,
prophetically....

Other reflections

• As usual Puji really imparted his heart to us and God used him powerfully to challenge and convict me
• GSL WILL start again (watch out for this space!)
• Puji doesn't just preach, his walking it out in his own life, I love people who are being honest and real, they are such an inspiration!
• Sometimes we don't realize the significance of God's word
• Do I want to live normal life or a Supernatural life
• The HARVEST is not the problem, its plentiful! (Matt9:37) The workers are!
• And Im one of the lazy workers that got his butt whopped big time. Thx for waking me up God! :)
• I've not been good in diciplining myself to do the things I need to do e.g. Praying and during DMM Manging our Time+ Praying was taught, How awesome is that?
• got me thinking, WHAT IF I had prayed more, WHAT IF I had taken that time just to intercede..... this wouldn't have happened, this Could happen
• yea right.. no what if.. whats done is done. I need to get my prayer life to be consistent again
• its time for the unchurched to be churched!!

quick update

So I haven’t update my blog for quite awhile now. Haven’t been doing much with blogging, msn-ing, or even facebooking. Guess its a good sign.

Went on a camping trip last weekend down to Boonah and sleeping outdoors under the tarb at 0 degrees? Sick! Woke up with ice on our face..... (kiddin) Rock climbing was a good experience and I managed to conquered the rocky mountain, with my flabby tummy which was pretty cool. Didn’t get to do much waterskiing but its all cool. Speaking of flabby tummy, I think I need to start doing jogging, and karate again just to get back some muscles and tone my body up, its seriously getting so obvious that people can notice the beer belly I’m having X(

Last week was the first time in a long time where I got so frustrated and depressed by playing sports, the last time was Basketball back home 5 years ago and now I felt it again playing tennis last week, had this stupid feeling that I felt like quitting the sport because I’ve been the same and not improving at all whereas everyone is getting better. There you go again Jason thinking too much and comparing yourself to others. I still don’t have the mood to play tennis yet maybe I should go back to basketball which I haven’t touch for a month..... or maybe not do sports at all ........ far out! XD

oh... and had my first Long Island Ice tea last night... sweeett!! Happy Birthday Renee =)

got to love twitting

Psalm 100

Psalm 100
Shout for joy to the LORD, all the earth. Worship the LORD with gladness; come before him with joyful songs. Know that the LORD is God. It is he who made us, and we are his; we are his people, the sheep of his pasture. Enter his gates with thanksgiving and his courts with praise; give thanks to him and praise his name. For the LORD is good and his love endures forever; his faithfulness continues through all generations.

wow wow wow, never before that Psalm 100 has spoken to me in such a real and tangible way. Tired from work and catching up I came back home so dry and weary, but I told myself, I need to spend time with God. It was so hard at first.... my heart was weary, Im almost empty but I told myself to not let my heart be weary in seeking God. crying out ' Pour out more, pour out more, im not satisfied' and true enough after awhile I fought and got my connection. ---> fast forward to free worship... I find myself dancing in my room like a crazy man, up and down, and the joy of the Lord filled me, and God told me that I was dancing in His courts. THING IS for the past 4 days at work has been busy I've been running up and down working and has not let my leg rest properly and because of that one of my muscles was hurting, it was the soft muscles tat allows your knee to bend, whatever you call it. anyway I was dancing and dancing forgetting about the pain and after the worship session I realized my muscle pain was gone and healed!!! =D

When we're dry and broken we come to God, In His presence there will be healing for the broken and thirsty. The outcome I believe should be Joy, the supernatural Joy of God when we enter His presence. Catch the revelation of His goodness and love in your worship times, God's INVITING you to enter Joyfully into God's presence :)

"YOU are His"